Why Cartoonist Will Rule in 2007
There is no denying that cartoonists are very astute commentators on culture. Often their artwork can even sway public opinion and help shape culture. But in 2007, there is a movement that will see the cartoonist rise to new heights of power and influence in a way never thought possible.
Think about this for a moment…
Our current world leaders are, in most cases, elected by the people, but in doing so make promises they can’t keep and spend untold amounts of time and energy degrading their opposition. Once in power, it seems the aim becomes one of self interest instead of that for the people – unnecessary wars are placed high on the agenda, military spending becomes the biggest budget item and the lives of innocent people are sacrificed for an unknown objective.
Life becomes oppressive. Fun disappears. Laughter fades into memory.
The cartoonists of the world will stand for this no longer and instead unite to restore a balance. Pencils will become the weapon of choice and any policy that can’t be drawn in a three panel cartoon strip will be discarded.
Here’s what we plan to do:
1. Get rid of suits.
Suits are stuffy and stifle creative thinking. All wars are started by men in suits and ties, probably because their tie is done up too tight, restricting blood flow to the brain. When brain circulation is lacking, weapons of mass destruction appear to be a very real threat and the solution becomes “bomb the crap out of everything that moves.”
2. Spend all military budgets on art classes, especially art classes for kids.
Imagine how much better the world would be if instead of every bomb that was dropped, a painting was created. These paintings would become our vision and, in time, the vision would become a reality. Realistic paintings, cartoons, sculpture – the medium doesn’t matter – it’s the art that counts.
3. Create new forms of conflict resolution.
I’ve seen meetings take place where conflicted parties meet, talk, shake hands, and then a week later try to kill each other all over again. The cartoonist has a unique form of conflict resolution that I’m proud to reveal. Firstly, we sit all conflicted parties on a chair in front of a group of caricaturists (people who draw cartoon likenesses of people). Then, the caricaturists draw all of the people who are fighting, but they draw them naked. Then, all of the drawings are revealed to the whole group. Amongst the embarrassed giggles and muffled laughter that follows, the conflicted parties will realize that when you take the clothes away, we’re really all just people. Funny, quirky people that look pretty funny in the nude – and when people start to laugh together, differences become less important and peace is given a chance.
4. Declare that nothing is really that serious.
Well, natural disasters are, and they should be seen as such, but the stupid decisions that we have made as a race deserved to be laughed at. We should be able to laugh at each other. We should be able to laugh at ourselves. As mentioned above, if any topic or agenda can’t be drawn as a cartoon to make people laugh, then it doesn’t deserve our time and effort. See number 3 for why laughter is important.
5. Finally, all elections will be decided on who can draw the best cartoon.
Every ballot paper will be a comic book featuring the artwork of all the candidates, which voters will choose by simply tearing out the one they like and placing it in a ballot box. The successful candidate will then have their cartoon reproduced on license plates for the duration of their term. History books will transform into comic books and learning about our past will become fun!
There are still a few details left to work out, but I hope that even at this early stage, you will be inspired by the way the world could be if cartoonists were in charge. My hope is that in 2007 culture will not simply be influenced by cartoonists, but created.
And created to be FUN.
Thanks to Matt Grover
|
